Cosmik Debris is a song by American composer Frank Zappa, from his 1974 album Apostrophe ('). It concerns the Mystery Man, a typical guru or psychic, offering to help the narrator reach Nirvana for a "nominal service charge," and the narrator's refusal to buy into his act, "Look here, brother, who you jiving with that cosmik debris?" When the Mystery Man gets pushy, Zappa as the narrator tells how he snatched the crystal ball, hypnotized the Mystery Man, stole his stuff and blew his mind.

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