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Artist
Jesse Gertz
12+ albums
folkexperimentalmaine
about
jesse gertz is a portland, maine based musician. he is the most amazing human being now living. once you have let jesse gertz's music grace your ears any other sound will leave you tasting blood in your mouth. perhaps you are wondering why it is that you have never heard of jesse gertz. it is as the poet addison said; nothing is more amiable than true modesty, and nothing more contemptible than the false. jesse gertz has been called a god among men. women swoon at the mere sight of him, and if one of these girls has a boyfriend, that boyfriend bows down to the pure power and testosterone that is jesse gertz. jesse gertz sometimes gets trampled by women when he is trying to get in and out of his house, but he just brushes his shoulder off and goes about his business. jesse gertz got his start in the music business at the age of three when he single handedly conquered the underground world of bongo-freestyle in nyc. after thoroughly crushing the hopes of all who dreamed of becoming a bongo-freestyle virtuoso, jesse gertz took a five year break from glamour of underground bongo-freestyle while honing his jew’s harp skills. at the age of eight, just as jesse gertz was preparing his comeback to bongo-freestyle, tragedy struck. in a freak jew’s harp accident, jesse gertz tore both his upper and lower lip off of his face. jesse gertz then fell into a a dark, wet, greasy ten year tunnel of hookers, steak knives, graffiti, trebuchets, and world war ii memorabilia, emerging with recons
