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Artist
Paris, Shropshire, Corfu (1486 - present) Lighting his twelfth cigar before breakfast, Asa "Fruit 'n' Fibre" Doktor (born Christov Uleces Nickelagulai Triforeskin) gently slipped into his most comfortable armchair, a fine leather Elizabethan model which he had ransacked in his ransacking days. He heard the subtle tap of an ebony cane on his mahogany door and bid the tapper entry. It was Sir T Vicious, a fellow gentleman and entrepreneur who's beats are reported to be delicious, his eyes suspicious and his bass malicious. He bore the scars of one who had spent many years making a living in the dark bass mines of Essex and forging beats in one of London's great distilleries. The two men had met to discuss a wager of 53 shillings. The challenge was to produce a crispier snare than the other could. After many years of oven baking, the snares were ready to be tested. They produced such crispy tones that the invigilator who had been brought in to give an unbiased verdict was instantly destroyed. After a few pints of sherry, all was forgotten and our heroes returned to their normal lives. During the lengthy period of snare crisping, Asa "Crunchy Granola" Doktor made a number of beat-based experiments and has now shared audio documentation of his exploits with the world. His début album "Untitled Album", a Calpol fuelled romp through space and time was received with little recognition in Holland but exploded through the Norwich underground electro-soul scene like a bague