Recovery is an effort in healing and well-being. It is an effort in describing things that cannot be described. And most of all, it is an expression of pure emotion. In November of 2020, a short while after the release of “Hyper Boreal,” I was violently attacked on the street for being trans. I have been attacked for this many times, from slurs and hate speech to attempted assaults. Yet I have never been affected so much by such hate in the past, but something about this event was different... Perhaps it was the scores of onlookers who did nothing. Perhaps it was the members of my local community who apologized for my attacker and victim-blamed me; all while they minimized how important and violent it was. Perhaps it was seeing that man again shortly after mere blocks from my home. Or maybe, just maybe, it was because he succeeded. Anti-Trans violence has only become more regular since this event, and I have struggled to keep myself from re-traumatization day-in and day-out. I developed agoraphobia (commonly understood as the fear of certain places/going outside), and I had to work so hard every day to be okay. For a long time, I have worn my gender and my queerness as armour so as to shield others from the suffering I have had. This man found his way under that armour, and made that armor feel like a prison again. So here I am, letting this music stand on its own. I write music for myself and often to process. To release any music made during this period without acknowled